Narcissism is becoming rampant in the modern world, and as a result, more and more people are suffering abuse on a daily basis. The best way to protect yourself is to empower yourself with the right knowledge and time appropriate action.
But knowledge alone will not be able to protect you from the wrath of your abusers. You must also learn to effective shield and protect yourself from toxic energies. Therefore, in this article I have compiled information that will serve as a practical guide that will help you heal yourself.
However, please note that this not going to be a medical guide. If you have been a victim of narcissistic abuse and are currently undergoing severe depression or any medical condition, I highly recommend that you also consult a certified therapist, specialist, or certified medical expert, in addition to using this energy healing guide.
As someone who has been a victim of narcissistic abuse for over three decades of his life, I will discuss with you – how to heal yourself by balancing the energy points of your spiritual body, also known as the chakras.
Information in the article is from a spiritual perspective, which I believe addresses the root cause of the problem. It will help you to understand why you took abuse in the first place, how your vulnerabilities were exploited, and what steps you need to take in order to rebuild your lost self-esteem and confidence.
If you’ve been a victim of narcissistic abuse, it’s high time that you gear up and take steps to put an end to abuse.
What is Narcissism? Identifying the Patterns and Symptoms of Abuse
Narcissism is a condition in which an individual consistently indulges in self-aggrandizing behaviors. For example, a narcissist likes to keep a very dominant voice during a conversation and tries to dominate or manipulate every conversation for their own agendas. They want to come across as very knowledgeable and ‘know it all’ kind of people.
They will not listen to or acknowledge the point of view of other people. Every conservation generally ends with how great they are, or how they are the victim in every situation. It’s all about them and they have no hesitation in cutting others while talking.
Narcissists are incapable of feeling any empathy towards another person. They may show that they care, but it’s only to fulfill their own selfish needs. They have an exaggerated sense of self, an extremely low self-esteem, and a highly fragile ego. However, outwardly they project high arrogance and superiority.
The reason why a narcissist likes to abuse is because they operate in an infinite cycle of reward and punishment. On first impression they come across as very charismatic and confident personality. They project themselves as perfect human beings and they like to prey upon vulnerable people, specially the empaths.
So, in order to lure their prey, they employ the strategy of reward, where they offer all kind of help and support. They come across as very loving and understanding, but what they are basically doing is – they are gathering information about your weaknesses and trigger points. They are trying to learn what triggers you emotionally.
Once they have all the information, a time comes, when they start punishing you. Now they will deliberately point out your weakness to you. Since they have low self-esteem, they want to pull you down and make you feel bad. By doing this they get a very sadistic pleasure.
Sorry To Interrupt! A Quick Note Before We Proceed Further
Narcissists can sense your empathic tendencies, and that is when they create a plan to unearth your weaknesses and trap you with lies, deceit, and gaslighting.
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They may pass a comment on your looks, your clothing, your body, your parenting skills, your cultural and religious beliefs, or anything that triggers you. If you confront them, they will dismiss it as a joke, or put the blame back at you, or use phrases like, “Why did you have to upset me?”, “Oh! You are so sensitive”, “Toughen up! It’s a bad world out there”, etc.
They keep repeating this pattern of abuse because they need constant reassurances of how great they are. They enjoy the fact that you are a puppet in their hands and the fact that you are not strong enough to protect your boundaries.
They are delusional and they live in their own world. They are also blatant pathological liars and they have no regard for emotions and feelings of other people. They are all about power, status, and control.
People who are raised by narcissistic parents are ones who are worst affected. They have to undergo years of therapy work to gain back their lost self-worth and confidence.
Some of the symptoms of narcissistic abuse are as follows:
- You engage in excessive people-pleasing behavior, even at the cost of your own comfort and wellbeing. You always say ‘Yes’ to unreasonable requests and favors, and you have a hard time saying ‘No’ because of the fear that you might offend others.
- You struggle emotionally because you have not been taught how to handle your own emotions in the first place. You experience anger, resentment, and irritability for unknown reasons (emotional flashbacks).
- You are utterly confused about your relationship. On one side you want the relationship to work, but on the other hand, you can’t take the abuse. What you’re experiencing is known as cognitive dissonance and you feel that you’re stuck in a toxic relationship.
- You constantly seek validation from others because you have been taught to do that by your abuser. You have always been told that you have to be in a certain way in order to feel worthy and respected.
- You suffer from low self-esteem because of the constant abuse. The reason for this is because you have subconsciously picked up the idea of ‘perfection’ from your abuser and now it is impossible for you to meet their standards.
- You seek dependency on others.
- You struggle in your career and your finances are in mess.
- You have a hard time trusting and opening up to other people.
- You experience stress, anxiety, and depression.
What exactly is Energy Healing?
Just as we inhale and exhale the atmospheric air in order to sustain the physical body and its functions, we also exchange with the universe another form of energy that helps in sustaining the spiritual or the ethereal body.
Our spiritual body is different from the physical body and its presence cannot be detected with modern scientific instruments. However, ancient yogis and sages across many ages have confirmed the presence of mysterious energy (known as the kundalini) flowing through the energy channels of the spiritual body known as the chakras.
Energy flow across these energy points, or chakras, directly influences our physical and mental well-being. There are seven chakras in the spiritual body with energy flowing in and out of them at all times.
If the energy flow across a chakra is deficient, the chakra is said to be underactive, whereas, if the energy flow is in excess, it is said to be overactive. Both of these conditions create psychosomatic problems.
Therefore, it’s very important to have optimal energy inflow and outflow (balance) within all of the chakras in order to live a completely fulfilled life.
When all the chakras are in balance, we get rid of our animalistic traits and wake up to superconsciousness or higher consciousness that enables us to live a life full of joy and harmony with the entire existence.
Healing Yourself After Narcissistic Abuse
We will only be talking about the first five chakras because the last two chakras deal with the metaphysical aspects which I believe are out of the scope of our discussion here. These five chakras are:
- Root Chakra.
- Sacral Chakra.
- Solar Plexus Chakra.
- Heart Chakra, and
- Throat Chakra
It is important to work on all of the chakra in the order of their occurrence from bottom to top. This is because a blockage in higher chakra affects the lower chakras, and vice-versa.
The first three chakras are associated with material living, physical wellness, and existence, while the higher chakras are associated with spiritual development and consciousness.
Healing the Root Chakra
Root chakra or the Muladhara is the very first chakra of the spiritual body and is located somewhere near the end of the spine. This is the resting place of our kundalini energy where it lies dormant and coiled up like a snake.
This chakra is associated with safety, survival, vitality, emotional needs, fulfilment of our materialistic needs such as shelter, food, water, clothing, physical health and general well-being.
Whenever there is an imbalance in the root chakra there are mental and physical symptoms associated with it. Some of them are as follows:
- Feeling of insecurity
- Restlessness, Irritation, and Anger
- Inability to take action
- Codependent behavior
- Financial problems
- Lack of motivation
- Insomnia and depression
Narcissistic abuse over the course of time generates fears that get accumulated into the root chakra and hinders the flow of vital energy across it. If you want to know more about the signs and symptoms of blocked root chakra, go through my article 6 Signs of Blocked Root Chakra.
Some of ways in which you can heal the root chakra are as follows:
- Practicing grounding techniques that help in establishing connection with mother earth.
- Practice some of the easy yoga poses like corpse pose, thunderbolt pose, cobra pose, etc.
- Spend time with positive and uplifting people.
- Minimize your contact (go no contact if possible) with the narcissist and don’t seek any kind of emotional support.
- Use healing stones and crystals (speeds up the healing process).
- Practice meditation and mindfulness (extremely effective).
Before We Proceed Further! Check Out The Root Chakra Healing Course
Do you struggle with restlessness, insecurity, and anger issues? There’s likely an issue with your root energy. Root chakra forms the strong foundation for physical, emotional, psychological, and spiritual development. Reclaim your freedom and sense of security, stability, and vitality by harnessing the power of root chakra energy. Check out the Root Chakra Course.
This course includes 1-hr MP3 audio, 25-minute guided meditation for root chakra activation, and PDF worksheets to assess your progress. Healing your energy body is the key to ultimate freedom and fulfillment. In this course, we begin with a deep understanding of the root energy, go into the main causes of the blockages, learn grounding techniques, and use affirmations (in the guided meditation) to release the trapped energy. For more details, check out The Root Chakra Course.
Note: This is a complete beginner-friendly chakra course, there are no prerequisites, and I have included my direct email contact if you have any concerns or doubts.
Healing the Sacral Chakra
Sacral, or the Swadhishthana is the second chakra that is located near the region of the reproductive organs. This chakra is associated with sensuality, pleasure, abundance, and joy. Opening up this chakra gives you access to the creative intelligence within you.
Some of the symptoms of sacral chakra blockage are as follows:
- Lack of confidence.
- Inability to think creatively.
- Lack of sexual desire.
- Fear of intimacy.
- Day dreaming.
- Over indulgence in addictions.
- Physical symptoms like constipation, lower back pain, kidney infection, impotence and infertility.
Again, meditation helps a lot in balancing the energy flow across the sacral chakra. In addition, you should also start eating clean (organic fruits and vegetables), use essential oils, use healing stones and crystals, live a healthy lifestyle, and keep yourself hydrated.
If you want complete information in healing the sacral chakra, please go through this detailed article Healing the Sacral Chakra Blockage.
Healing the Solar Plexus Chakra
Next we have the solar plexus chakra, also known as the Manipura. It is associated with self-development, transformation, and personal growth. It is located approximately two inches above the naval region.
Symptoms of blocked solar plexus chakra are as follows:
- Low self-esteem.
- Inability to take decisions.
- Need to control others
- Pass judgment on others
- Physical symptoms like laziness, fatigue, diabetes, obesity, gas, and constipation.
Balancing the solar plexus helps in building high self-esteem, gain control over your thoughts and emotions, set healthy boundaries with people, gives you the power to manifest your thoughts, and builds self-discipline.
Some of ways that help in balancing the solar plexus are:
- Practicing yoga poses like child’s pose, corpse pose, bow pose, etc.
- Practicing general relaxation and breathing techniques.
- Practicing meditation.
- Using healing crystals like Amber and Citrine.
- Using essential oils.
For detailed information on healing the solar plexus chakra, please go through my article Healing Solar Plexus Chakra Blockage.
Healing the Heart Chakra
Heart chakra, also known as the anahata, is said to be the ‘seat of the soul’. As the name suggests, it is located near the region of the heart, and balancing the energy flow across it enables us to feel unlimited love, kindness, compassion, and forgiveness.
Victims of abuse often struggle with feeling unworthy of love. They are angry and resentful towards their abuser, and as a result of this, it’s gets difficult for them to heal. Opening up the heart chakra helps in ‘letting go’ of the past traumas and episodes of abuse.
All of the negative emotions experienced as a result of years of abuse obstruct the flow of vital energy across the heart chakra. Therefore, it’s very important to work on the anahata.
I would suggest you to refer to my article Healing the Heart Chakra Blockage.
Healing the Throat Chakra
Vishuddha, or the throat chakra is located near the throat and this is the last chakra we are going to discuss in this article. Up until now, we were mostly dealing with survival strategies for the physical material world, but now we are entering the realm of higher spirituality and awakening.
Throat chakra is associated with:
- Power of expression.
- Building emotional resilience.
- Building confidence
- Getting rid of the fears and doubts, and more.
If you experience high anxiety regularly, this is one chakra you need to work on.
Healing the throat chakra will help you to develop effective communication skills. It will harness your ability to talk less and listen more. But whenever you talk, your worlds and the way you sound will be very impactful.
As a victim of abuse, I had lost the ability to clearly communicate my thoughts and opinions in front of others. I used to feel intimidated. I was sacred that people would make fun of me. All that changed when my throat chakra started opening up.
Most well-known public speakers have a highly balanced throat chakra. It’s not about speaking in a loud voice. It’s more about choosing the right words and creating a greater impact with creative thoughts and ideas.
For more information on healing the throat chakra, please check out the article Ultimate Guide to Healing the Throat Chakra.
Chakra Alignment/Healing Worksheets
If you’re serious about working on your energy body, I have a fantastic resource that can greatly help in your endeavor of clearing your energy blockages. It includes information sheets, alignment worksheets, and chakra affirmations printables.
You can check out the 7 Chakra Healing Worksheet Bundle (With Free Chakra Information Sheets)
Final Thoughts: My Experience
Narcissists are devoid of real human emotions and it’s very difficult for them to feel the emotions of others. Their mentality is similar to that of a predator whose only objective is to satisfy its own needs without any consideration for others.
It took me five years of hard work to overcome the trauma I experienced from years of narcissistic abuse. I have been practicing mindfulness and meditation in order to heal myself and raise my vibrations.
My first action in the line of defense was to gain financial independence. When you are co-dependent on your narc it’s very difficult to block abuse. After that, I started limiting my contact with the narc and worked extensively on my physical and mental well-being.
So, if you are in a similar position start working on yourself now. Don’t wait for someone to come and rescue you or expect your abuser to change. Narcissists are incapable of change.